Carried

So, a couple of weeks ago I was moaning. Yes, I know, let that sink in. Anyway, I was complaining that Scotland was distinctly unimpressed with my pilgrimage, largely because I wasn't wild camping. (Stuart Owen (@pilgrimscairn) • Instagram photos and videos). I'm delighted to report today that having walked across Mull overnight I have at last won Scotland's respect, or at least Mull's. Since getting back to the hotel last night I've had a 'fair play to you', a slap on the back, a high five and a complimentary glass of Merlot. It was all worth it after all.

This morning did not begin with me lathering my shoulders with Deep Heat. This morning's breakfast was not followed by an Ibuprofen chaser. My knees are not tightly held in elastic supports. This morning I struggled to put my jeans on, and not for the reason you might think (actually, I think I've lost quite a bit of weight); I struggled because what I really wanted to do was put my waterproof trousers on, still smeared with the mud of Glen Noe (A Pilgrim's Cairn: Many rivers to cross), and I really knew that I shouldn't. After breakfast I spent about an hour just staring out of my bedroom window at the land and the weather, like a restless dog.

According to Garmin I've walked a total of 488.5 miles, 190 hours and 11 minutes, and made a total ascent of 11,387 metres. That ascent is the equivalent of climbing Everest and then coming about a third of the way down. I'm sure that some of you will rather be relishing the idea of me perpetually stuck a third of the way down Everest; don't get used to the idea, I'm getting the train home to my boys tomorrow.

My main feeling this morning though is not centred on what I've achieved, but on all that I've been given. I'm pleased that I completed the walk, I was far from confident that it was 'in the bag' when I left Berkhamsted a month ago. What will last though, I believe, is not what I've 'done' but what God has given me. It has been a month of such grace, love and growth. I walked a long way, but for the most important part of the journey I've been on I was carried.

At Morning Prayer every day I've read the words of Jesus: 'Ask, and it will be given to you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you. For everyone who asks receives, and everyone who searches finds, and for everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.' I simply knocked, but it was Another Who opened the door. I sought and I was found.

In the 'Nine Hostages' coffee shop in Derry I wrote down a prayer that my friend Rabbi Neil had sent me from The Talmud (A Pilgrim's Cairn: Pilgrimage: the eyes of all who see me.). At the start of every day's walking I've read that prayer. It ends, 'let me find grace, kindness and compassion in Your eyes and in the eyes of all who see me.' Over and over again I have been met with that gaze of grace, kindness and compassion.

Blessed are You, Lord, Who hears prayer.